It’s been a while since I made a post here. I don’t even know if anyone still bothers to come here, but oh well. Maybe an update is due?
There’s been a lot and nothing going on in my life right now. I have been trying to work on myself for the past few months with the help of a therapist, which hasn’t exactly been easy since I’ve had to cancel to many times and this being public health care and all, it can take a while to get a reschedule. Apparently I have a severe depression and social anxiety, and as of recently, a few OCD tendencies.
To be honest, it’s been quite awful, as I am not used to the whole talking to someone about my problems, but it will come eventually (at least I hope). I don’t think I ever realized it was going to be this hard to actually get better. If you’re not a hundred present committed, then don’t even bother. Which is kind of the problem with depression, your just not committed enough to actually want to get better. I can’t say how everyone else feels about this, but at least that is how I am. One side I don’t want to feel this way or do the things that I do, but then I got turn around and do something stupid or self destructive. It only ends up biting me in the ass later, hurting me and the people that I love.
Anyway, this is why I don’t post updates anymore. Because once I do write something, I go on rambling into a long post which I know nobody wants to read, so I will try to work on that. I will try to do get some real writing done some time soon. Once I can get my brain to focus for more than five minutes. Until then, I am going to read up on my blogger subscriptions.